Question: "Birthing Centers VS At Home Birth VS Hospital....Which do you prefer?? What do you wish you would have done differently or are you happy with the way everything turned out...What will you do for your next child??"
| Hospital? Birth Center? or Home Birth? |
My Hospital Experience
There were two experiences that happened a couple of months before I became pregnant that influenced my decision to have a home birth. The first was when a very minor accident at work that landed me in the emergency room, mostly to satisfy the human resources department. Yes, I did work at a desk in front of a computer, so you can imagine how silly I felt! The doctor finally came in after I waited all afternoon and ordered a (what I now consider to be completely unnecessary) MRI.As I lay flat on my back being wheeled down bleak corridors with lights glaring in my eyes, one thought rang loudly in my mind: this is no place for a baby to be born! Even then, I lay vulnerable, passing by strangers while sporting a hospital gown with someone else directing my movements. I knew then that there was no way a hospital could be the stage for the most intimate moment of my life, the birth of a baby.
Paradigm Shift
About the same time, I happened to catch The Business of Being BornMaking the Decision
While I was researching our options, I remember turning to DH one night and saying, the medical technology available at a birth center is basically the same as what we would have at home, so why not just have a home birth? That was the first time I really considered what some would consider this radical option. Poor DH was left sputtering, Don't we need a doctor? Shouldn't we go to a hospital? Luckily he got on board quickly after our midwife answered all his questions during our first appointments. Poor guy, I'm afraid he didn't have much of a choice. Thank you Lord for this man who puts up with all of my crazy!We sat down at the interview with our midwife and she asked me why I wanted a home birth? Until that point I didn't realize that she almost exclusively helped women birth at home; I thought a birth center might still be a possibility. When I answered her question the words just flowed, and in a way I convinced myself right then to have a home birth. In that moment I realized that was exactly what it was I wanted.
When I told people I was planning a home birth several responded, Aren't you scared? I could honestly answer them that I had no fear about having a home birth. I had thoroughly done my research and was confident that a home birth was a safe and healthy decision for myself and my baby. The only fear I had was of hospitals, cascading medical interventions, IVs, and epidural needles.
How It All Tuned Out
Our home birth almost a year ago now was an amazing experience and I will definitely do it again for any future births. I would encourage any healthy woman to seriously consider that route. I believe that part of the reason I had such a positive experience was that being in my own home helped me stay comfortable and relaxed. After the birth I only had to walk down the hall to my own bedroom to rest and cuddle my baby. I didn't have to pack up, get dressed, or ride in a car. Baby and I didn't even leave the house for a couple of weeks.
Could I have had a natural birth at a hospital? Yes, I'm sure I could have, but I didn't want to be deemed the "bad patient" fighting hospital protocol every step of the way. Now that I know how uncommunicative labor made me, it would have been entirely up to DH to fight for our birth plan and make decisions for me. I also think a doula to support us both would have been a must. There are of course hospitals that are more inclined towards natural birth and infant care than others. The Baby Friendly Hospitals Initiative is making a big difference at encouraging good practices. Click to find a baby friendly hospital in your area.
Could I have had a natural birth at a hospital? Yes, I'm sure I could have, but I didn't want to be deemed the "bad patient" fighting hospital protocol every step of the way. Now that I know how uncommunicative labor made me, it would have been entirely up to DH to fight for our birth plan and make decisions for me. I also think a doula to support us both would have been a must. There are of course hospitals that are more inclined towards natural birth and infant care than others. The Baby Friendly Hospitals Initiative is making a big difference at encouraging good practices. Click to find a baby friendly hospital in your area.
More Information
Of course this isn't a comprehensive discussion of all the considerations that go into choosing the right birth location for you. Many other authors have written on the subject. Check out my list of 9 Must Read Natural Birth Books for a few of my favorites.This post is linked up with The EO, Frugally Sustainable, & Sorta Crunchy.
Please don't be dogmatic about saying there's "no way" a hospital could be a proper place for a baby's birth. Many hospitals now have "family birthing units" where labor and delivery take place in a comfortable, relaxed settings and appropriate technology available if emergency intervention is needed. If my daughter had not gone to such a hospital, both she and my grandson would have died, and I would not now be awaiting the birth of my second grandson (by scheduled C-section, because she cannot deliver naturally).
ReplyDeleteAnonymous: Thank goodness your daughter and grandson were right where they needed to be for a healthy birth!
DeleteI didn't find this article dogmatic at all. Rather, she was sharing her personal experience and what worked best for her. She never said there was "no way" a hospital could be a proper place for a baby's birth.
I haven't decided what I'll do when it's my time to give birth, but I valued learning about your experience, Growing Slower!
Anonymous, congratulations on the upcoming arrival of your grandchild! I must admit it's with a little glee that I hear you call me dogmatic. Really I am quite passionate about this topic. Maybe I should have said the hospital was no place for MY baby to be born. At any rate, I hope you were able to hear more than just that phrase in this post. My wish is for all women to be fully educated on all their birth options and be and to empowered to choose the best option for them and their baby. I acknowledge that most women do give birth in hospitals, and I would never want to take away from the experiences of my dear friends who happily gave birth to their little ones in that setting. It grieves my heart though to hear a woman told she cannot birth their babies naturally. In all my research there are very very few instances where this is truly the case. Big babies, breech, VBAC, multiples: they can all give birth naturally whether at home or in the hospital. (If anyone is reading this and would like more information I would love to point you to some resources.)
DeleteWhat she's saying is that since she's a healthy woman and has a healthy baby, there's not reason for her to have the baby at the hospital. This was the right decision for her. Not necessarily for anyone else. Besides, we've been giving birth for how many thousands of years and it was really only in the last 100 years that we've been going to hospitals to have a baby.
ReplyDeleteTC and Jonna, I'm so glad you were able to hear my heart through this post. I only want to share my experiences so that maybe a woman who does desire a natural or home birth will have her eyes opened that options and she will be encouraged that can do it! Too many times women are told they can't.
DeleteAfter having a home birth, I would never choose a hospital birth again :-)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your home birth! It is such an amazing experience, isn't it?
DeleteA future-mama posed this question on one of my favorite pregnancy forums a while back: That was me! Home Pregnancy test confirmed it yesterday that I am now an expecting mother! Thank you for all your wonderful conversation. I am catching up on my reading and taking diligent notes. I just set up a Dr. appointment for Monday...for real pregnancy tests. I have been patiently waiting and am so thankful for God to have placed this little miracle in our lives (hubby and me). I look forward to the search for a doula and midwife in the area. Thank you for your helpful guides and extravagant stories! You are an inspiration to me!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
A future-mama posed this question on one of my favorite pregnancy forums a while back, That was me! Last night, a home pregnancy test show a positive! I am so excited to begin this knew journey! Thank you for all your helpful information and inspiring stories. I made an apt. for Monday to get see if I really am pregnant. I'm trying not to get my hope up too high. i am only about 4 weeks along...very early. i have been doing research all morning about birthing centers in the area and finding the perfect Doula and Midwife. I am following your steps and taking diligent notes. I keep up with the emails that are sent and would love to include you in on this new chapter in my life, if you desire.
ReplyDeleteThank you Shannon!